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Burning the kaanara/candle at both ends

Burning the kaanara/candle at both ends

The last few months have been hectic and I have literally been putting everything into my business. Body, mind and soul. Burning the kānara at both ends.  If I was awake at 4.51 am, I’d go out to our big room and make earrings.  Idea at 3 .30 am … go out to our big room and make earrings. At times I was working until 10 pm at night and then attempt to go to bed at 10.30 pm with my mind buzzing and dreaming of recycled rubber earring designs. 

Last Thursday we went to a Pecha Kucha event in Murihiku/Invercargill.  Not too late a night, in bed by 11.30 pm.  One major disadvantage of living rurally is drive time.  Basically, add another hour onto your evening folks for this. 

On Friday, eight of us converged on Arrowtown for a girl’s weekend.  Lots of laughs and more drinks but I wasn’t feeling quite right.  I actually thought I was going to get a migraine mid Friday afternoon. So, I took some paracetamol and purchased an energy drink.  I know how bad energy drinks are but that was how desperate I was feeling.

Saturday, more laughs, one wine and then my husband and I headed away to a beautiful location for a friends 50th birthday celebration. But I was knackered and my head was literally buzzing and bouncing. I physically could not enjoy the atmosphere, company or kai. 

Sunday morning – I was feeling terrible.  I won’t go into details but nothing had improved.  We checked out and when I got home, I lay down and rested.  I was trying to work out what was going on and then suddenly I remembered the last time I had felt like this.  I was burning out, not quite burnt out but my body was giving me strong signals that this could not continue.

I love my mahi and I want to be doing this in 5, 10, 15 years.  I want to have the energy to be creative, come up with new amazing designs and ideas. My dream is to have a company similar to Elk or Stella and Gemma but I have to look after myself to be able to do this, to get my business to this level, to move it beyond a small home-based business. But if I do not look after myself then this will not be my reality. 

I have put some simple boundaries in place to keep me well and safe: 

  • Earring making hours 9 am – 9 pm.  

  • Exercise – daily if possible

  • Nutritious brain food – snack on berries, yoghurt, nuts, seeds, dark chocolate 😊

  • A lunch break away from my jewellery making area

  • Before I go to bed spend some time with my rangatiratanga/hubby 

 

I wrote this blog because I think a lot of wahine give too much of themselves, of ourselves, frequently putting everything else before our own well-being. To finish is a quote from one of the most inspirational wahine I think on the planet – Oprah Winfrey 

“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.”

 

Posted: Thursday 22 October 2020